Sunday, May 24, 2009

Sex and the Single Guy.

Well, I guess it had to happen sooner or later...I'm officially a "blogger" now. I won't even begin to kid myself or anyone who happens to stumble on to this blog that I have the slighest clue on what I'm doing, but I promise you I will try to keep it interesting. What's going to be the topic for discussion you might ask? Sex...Sex...and more Sex...from an average guy's point of view. If your ears are delicate, then now is the time to exit...you still here? Good...nice of you to stay. So the topic at hand is sex. So what? What's the big deal? What makes me qualified to speak on the topic? The answer is simple...I'm just your ordinary,average guy..who loves to fuck, and just happens to get his fair share of pussy. I'm not a model, porn star,athelete,rapper,actor, or lawyer. Nope just your average Joe ladies and gents. I did at one time work for a big media conglomerate (who shall remain nameless) and I did enjoy some "perks" that came with my position', but that's another story. I left the coporate world some time ago to start my own consulting firm so now I work for Me,Myself,and I. The things I'm going to share with you are the thoughts and experiences of a man who's been around the world and back. I'm not a professional writer and I don't get paid to do this. I just think it would be fun or maybe just good therapy for me to get the things I've experienced off my chest. The stuff I talk about might not always be "politically correct" or all pretty with a little bow wrapped on it...but it will always be honest and from the heart. So now what makes me sooooo fucking special from the other countless guys who dream and fantasize about fucking America's Next Top Model or whoever today's hottest porn starlett(you fill in the blank) might be? The answer may be nothing at all...I'm a red-blooded,horny, nicely hung, sexual adventurer who lives for the thrill of the chase. What I do really can't be too far off the map when it comes to sex. But sometimes when I talk to my friends, guys and girls alike..they always seem suprised at the stuff I pull off. "You did WHAT...WHERE...with WHO??? You are something else!!!". I'm not some Romeo/Cassanova...I just happen to love the scent,touch,taste, and feel of "good pussy"...and I don't discriminate. When I say I get my "fair share"...I'm being modest, I've been with Black,White,Spanish,Asian; women older than me(before I even knew what a MILF or Cougar was) and women younger than me...again I repeat...I do not discriminate. And maybe that might be the difference. I know plenty of guys who only get with one type of female because of one thing or the other,wether it be a certain "look" or "body type"...and hey if that works for you; go for it. Over the years I've put away a lot of hang ups and stereotypes when it comes to the opposite sex. Remember the saying..."You can't judge a book...yadda yadda yah"...it's sooo true. For example, I remember dealing with this cute little Latina...we'll call her "Inez"(yes dear readers the names will be changed..but the game remains the same... I don't wan't to blow up anybody's spot.lol) It took me and Inez a minute to fuck because I literally thought I would break her tiny little Puerto Rican pussy in half. I mean she was like 4-11'...and that was with heels on.lol. Anyway, needless to say I've yet to meet a woman who can handle a dick like her...she had really good "pussy control"...she could squeeze a dick like a vice-grip(Kegel exercises ladies...it really does help.lol). On top of that she would do this thing with her hips where she would pivot downwards while I was thrusting in...damm it hurt...but in a good way...she always timed it just right. About a week after one of our marathon fuck sessions we were laying in bed and she asked "Why did you wait so long to make your move?" Of course I tried to brush it off with guy lines 101 "The timing wasn't right..", "I was just trying to take things slow...",blah,blah,blah. She saw right through my bullshit. So she asked me with her sly little grin " You thought I couldn't "handle" you huh?". All I could do from that point was chuckle. She told me how a lot of guys she had been with thought she was this "little doll" and it was she who usually had to fuck them. She definitely fucked like she had something to prove. So as we lay next to each other...my dick still tingling from the workout she gave me...she looked at me and asked"So what do you think now?". I jokingly told her I'd let her know how the sex was after I got the feeling back beneath my waist (Yeah guys..she was that good..seriously). I wasn't always a self-professed "pussy chaser", quite the opposite, I was really shy,reserved, and awkward around women...(I didn't know the "g-spot" from the "pee-spot")...but as I started to come into my own as a man, meet more women(I confess...the kinky ones did it.lol),experience different cultures; it started to get easier and easier...so now I can go into any situation(club,bar,bar-mitzvah.lol) and talk the panties off of any woman if I really wanted to. But I've got to admit, I had help along the way; mostly from women older than me who imparted little words of wisdom along the way. What I've come to realize is that most men aren't really patient when it comes to getting in tune with what a woman really wants sexually. Again I'm not some know-it-all guru...just a good listener. And guys the ladies are talking loud and clear, but we're just not hearing them. A woman who definitely set me straight was this older Italian lady(we'll call her "Angela") I was messing around with when I was working at this firm in mid-town Manhattan. She was an excutive assistant for one of the senior partners at the firm...and boy this woman looked good. She had to be in her mid 50's, but she could have easily passed for early 30's...nice personality...but don't get on her bad side...she'll let you have it in a New York minute...a real tough cookie type. She didn't have much of a body but she had great big tits...and she always wore low-cut stuff that showed off her cleavage. I was an intern right down the hall and would always watch how much foot traffic wether it be the guys on my floor, guys from the mail-room,delivery guys, or even the other bosses; they all would hover over her desk...probably just to get a peek at those tits...and she seemed to love the attention. There were other younger chicks in the office, but I would always hear guys my age and older talking about "Angela", and what they would do to her if they had the chance...some dudes even put it out there that she might have slept with one of the VP's. I always just thought that it was bullshit office talk. Anyway, at this stage in my life I was like a "player in training. I was constantly on the phone...even at work...trying to set up my next sexual rendezvous. I was a mess. I had all my little "booty calls" on speed dial...if one didn't pick up....I'd leave one of my "Hey baby, just thinking about you" messages....and call the next chick on the list. I was a real piece of work. I had to pass Angela's desk on my way to the elevator, so I would always say "Good Morning" or "Good Night" depending if I was coming or going. I was headed out the door one evening,said my usual "Good Night", she said"Good Night, loverboy..take it easy on the ladies.O.K?" I spun around real quick and she was smiling shaking her head. I was caught off guard, I didn't realize that I was that obvious. After that, what could I really say...I tried to be more discreet...and just kept it moving. Months later, Angela and I became cool enough through our daily "Hi and Bye" routine that we ended taking the train back to Brooklyn(I lived in Bed-Stuy and she lived in Sheepshead Bay). She always had little "jewels" to tell me when I had "girlfriend issues"...mostly she would end up telling me not to be a "prick","jerk", or "asshole"...she was brassy and sometimes didn't care who was within earshot..she told it like it was. Other people in the office started to notice how chummy we were and soon guys in the office were coming up to me like "What's up with you and Angela...you tapping that or what??" I was like "Nah, me and Angela are super cool...I see her on the train going home..but that's about it" I guess I was just so naive and immature at the time or I just didn't want the attention. But not too soon afterward I started hanging back after work so I wouldn't have to run into her on the way out. I was heading in one morning, saw Angela, said my usual "Good morning". She didn't say anything right away so I just assumed that she didn't hear me. I was about to say it again, then she said" I haven't seen you on the train going home? What, you don't like my company?". I muttered something about how I had to finish off work before I leave blah,blah,blah...I knew she wasn't buying it...but she didn't say anything. She just let me ramble on until I was finished. Then she said"Mmmmmm...O.K." And that was it. Not another word spoken. From that point on, we didn't do the "Hi and Bye's" anymore. I fucked up...I knew it, so it was like what's the point. The silent treatment went on for about 2 weeks straight then somebody on our floor decided it was time for our group to go out for drinks. I usually don't do the whole "drinking with people from the job" thing because sometimes people do and say things out of character, and it's hard to look at them the same way afterward; but I was like "What the hell...I really could use a drink right about now. Fuck it..Why not?". So we all end up at our designated drinking spot 0n 34th St...and people from the job wasted no time throwing back the drinks. I see Angela sitting with some ladies from the office, she gets up to use the bathroom; passes right by me without any words exchanged...I felt like saying something to her but I didn't want to look like an idiot. By like 1 am, it was a wrap...people were stumbling out the bar to catch cabs and get rides from people from our group. One of the bosses called for a car service so people wouldn't have to come out of their own pockets to get home. A handful of us lived in Brooklyn, so we all cram up into a Lincoln Towncar; and me and Angela got sqaushed up in the middle. It really felt awkward, everyone packed up in there like sardines trying to make smalltalk...Angela and I stuck in the middle, not saying a damm thing. Wasn't too long before it was just Angela and I in the car, so when the driver asked "Where to?" I told him he could take Angela home first. I was just being a gentleman. She said "Thanks" and before I could say anything she said " Oh God, I think I'm going to be sick". She had her head titled back,eyes closed, and she was reaching for the switch to roll down the windows...but her hand kept on missing it. I told the driver to roll down the window on her side, but he didn't hear me; so I reached over to the door on her side and cracked the window a little bit so some breeze could circulate in the car. As I reached back over to get to my side, my arm grazed her breast...I apologized...and she was like"It's O.K". The driver was flooring it, and his turns were swinging my leg into hers..so much so that I kept saying sorry when it happened. She was cool and was like "C'mon..don't worry about it sweetie, at least you know he'll get you home quickly." She had a little half smile when she said it... so bingo...just like that I felt the tension disappear...like now we're cool again...I didn't want to push it just in case I was reading the wrong signal from her so I sat back and didn't say anything. Then she asked me"What are you wearing? It smells nice." Before I could tell her what is was(something from Kenneth Cole)...I felt her breath on my neck. It was so sudden it startled me. The way she leaned into me I could feel her breast pushing against my arm...let me tell you they felt soft as cushions. That alone was enough to start the blood rushing to my dick...I could feel it pulsing underneath my boxers. I told her the name of my cologne and she leans in to get a second whiff...she puts her hand on my thigh to brace herself from crashing into me. Our driver(Mr Indy 500)...is cutting through sidestreets and Angela should be home like in 5 minutes. When she leaned in for that 2nd whiff I could feel her breasts pushing in closer...and her saying something like"Yeah, this really smells good on you...you've got good taste. Who's the lucky girl?" My mind was racing...and she wasn't making it easy for me....she was just too close...I HAD TO GO FOR IT. I looked over to her and saw her looking at me with one of the most softest expressions....I leaned in and kissed her. She didn't pull back..she just fell into me and let whatever was going to happen take it's course. The hand that she had on my thigh was making it's way up to my dick...which she found with no problem at all. She gave me one of those long "Mmmmmmmmmm's" and started to stroke my dick through my slacks. I reached up to feel her breast and gave it a firm squeeze(it was all real...no boob job here...thumbs up). She purred out "Uhhh unnnnn"....took my hand off her breast and slid it up her skirt between her legs. She didn't have to do anymore...I got the hint. I moved her panty to the side with one finger and started to massage her clit with the other. I could feel the heat and the moisteness start to build up."Is this the address??" the driver asked. We jumped apart, she looked around and told the driver "Yeah, right here is fine". The driver must of got a sense of what was going on because he waited for her to step out and straighten herself up. " Well...uhh..you coming in?" she asked. She definitely didn't have to ask twice, I slid out of the car and followed her into the house. We didn't waste anytime...as soon as she turned the key in the door and closed it our tongues were locked exploring each others mouth with intensity. I pinned her to the door and reached up with one hand to get a breast out of her blouse...and my other hand reached up under to the back of her skirt so I could squeeze her firm tight ass and pull her closer to me. She was expertly moving one hand down to my zipper and managed to pull out my dick from confinement...which she now had in her hand stroking up and down in a very slow rhythm. It was driving me crazy...with each stroke I could feel a little bit pre-cum ooze out of my already rigid dick."Looks like somebody wants to play" she said, and before I could say anything, she got on her knees and put my dick in her mouth. I could almost feel my dick against the back of her throat...that's how far she was trying to swallow me. The sight of her almost made me want to cum. She would throw her raven black hair against my stomach each time she went down on me...and coming back up she would be sucking me slowly looking at me with those seductive greenish-gray eyes of hers...it was almost too much to bear. She led me to the couch in the living room and threw me on my back with my dick pointing straight in the air. I pulled her to me and managed to get both breasts out of her top...they were the size of cantaloupes...and the areolas were HUGE...it almost freaked me out..I got over that real quick when I squeezed them together and started to suck them in rotation. She decided to have a little fun with me...she got up...slid off her clothes(but left her panty on) while I took off mine. With her back facing me she did a little lap dance rubbing her pantied ass on my dick...leaning back slowly grinding it. I pulled her back to me, cupped her breasts with my forearm and slid my free hand down through her panties and started to rub her clit. She was so wet I could feel the sticky heat on my fingers..I brought it up to her mouth and she sucked my fingers. All of this teasing must have been getting to her too because she slid off of me,disappeared; and was back with a condom in hand. She slowly slid the condom over my rock hard cock, and slowly lowered herself taking me in inch by inch. Her pussy was so hot and wet that each time she slid down on me I would thrust my hip up to hers so I could plunge myself deeper and deeper inside her. She threw herself down on me harder and harder, and I was pumping away at her faster and faster. She leaned towards me and her nice soft tits crashed against my chest....I decided to reach up and and suck them. I could start to feel her quiver against me "Oooohhh, ooooh...I'm going to cum...I'm going to cum!!!!"...she crashed down on me while she orgasmed and put her fingernails into my chest. The sight of this dark haired, green eyed Italian seductress(many years older than me) biting her lower lip and still milking me with hot wet pussy was really doing it for me. I slowly felt the sensation of cum erupting from my balls starting to make its way upwards. I grabbed her ass and made a final plunge.."Oooohhh shiiiiit" I screamed out...realeasing what seemed to loads of cum into the condom. It took a minute before either one of us would move...I was still taking it all in. "I'll be right back" she whispered as she slowly slid off me. I watching her tight tan body bounce to the kitchen. She came back with a glass of water...I took a sip...she inched her body next to mine on the couch. "You ready to go again???"....dammm...this woman had stamina!!!! Angela was the first older woman I fucked and she gave me alot of "firsts" as a matter of fact(anal,titty fucking,bondage..she was kinkiness at it's finest). We eventually fizzled out, but the stuff I learned from her pretty much prepared me on how to deal with the other women I got with after her. Angela was the one that told me that"All women underneath are whores...at least they want to be fucked like whores...you just have to know how to bring it out of them." Which I definitely can attest to. Some of the raunchiest, kinkiest stunts I've pulled off are with women who I never expected to be willing. But my dear readers.."As you know, you grow"...things don't just happen overnight. I'll defintely be keeping you up to date with my exploits,musings, and general take on what Sex in the Good Ole' Rotten Apple holds for the Average Joe with a "working stiff"(pun intended...it couldn't be helped.lol). In the meantime...keep your minds in the gutters..you horny devils. Note from The Author: The Pictures used in this Blog are random pics from the Internet. Although I do have pics of my own...I choose not to publish them.